SpeedBalling

Can I get my own reality show now? That could be my catch phrase.

What am I going to do now that I have rejoined the ranks of the unemployed? Well, find another job hopefully, but in the meantime I can sit around downloading tv episodes and movies.

In that spirit I have decided to put up some quick links to my favorite sites for snatching great stuff.

Bittorrent Clients:
You will need to install one of these before downloading files with torrents.
BitComet (Windows) - I prefer this client, but it is currently windows only

Azureus (Java/multi-platform) - This is probably the most popular torrent client, and it works on any platform supported by java (Mac, Windows, Linux, etc...)

BitTornado (Python/multi-platform) - This client is very similar to the original, but support bandwidth throtling. BitTornado can be easily installed on Windows, or run on any system with Python.

Torrent Sites:
These sites provide links to torrent files, which allow you to connect and actually download files.

SuprNova - Large site that posts torrents served by other sites. Since this site does not require registration it tends to be lower quality, but it has a huge number and variety of listed torrents, and it can help lead you to better quality sites.

TorrentBits *Registration Required* - This site focuses on 0-day group releases. It is the best place to get the latest movies, games, and apps. (AFAK the membership limit has been reached, so it is impossible to get membership at this time, but old accounts are periodically deleted, so new spots will open up.)

FileList *Registration Required* - A TB Clone, which is pretty damn good, and has membership slots available.

MySpleen *Registration Required* - TV site featuring mainly Cartoon Network, and Comedy Central. Good place to find Sealab, ATHF, Chappelle, etc. Only so-so seeder/leecher ratio, so not as fast as TB/FL.

So there you go. If you want to be as lazy as me, I have just drawn you a god damn maps, which means that you are actually even lazier than me.

slide slide slippity-slide

Ahhhh... Who doesn't love a little Coolio now and then?

I need to take a fucking voyage, one that gets me far away from my lame-ass fucking job. Working gets worse and worse everyday, and my permanent partner is fucking annoying. Luckily I have the option of getting stoned and watching Sealab 2021 all day, as opposed to actually doing any work.

On a side note, working isn't made any easier by getting text messages from my sister at noon saying that she is in Ibiza and high off her tits.

Apparently my good friend Mr. A isn't enjoying the JO too much either. If Weve Been Had were a bitching festival, it would be three days long with five stages and headliners from three continents.

Hey Mr. A: maybe you should get a new name to go with the new look - I was thinking that "The Princess Diaries" might work. [cue crazed laughter]

Somewhere in my cracked-out haze yesterday I decided it would be a good idea to watch "Alien vs. Predator." In retrospect I was wrong - very, very wrong.

Even with my brain functioning at just slighly above coma level, with my only physical motion pretty much limited to sniffling and lifting the beer bottle to my mouth, AvP is a revelation in stupidity and simple-minded sci-fi garbage. If you took all the worst parts of its predecessors and edited them together along with some fresh music and even worse dialouge, the result would achieve the same effect.

Luckily, I am the worlds biggest geek, and I just got a Laserdisc player, and the Star Wars Definitive Collection laserdisc set. After AvP I mustered the energy to hook up the LD player, and watched Star Wars, and Empire before going to bed at about 9:00pm and sleeping for fourteen hours.

I still feel like shit, and I have to go to work in two hours. I think I may need to call in.

I was gonna go to court
before i got high
i was gonna pay my child support
but then i got high
they took my whole paycheck
and i know why
cause i got high
because i got high
because i got high

Where to start, where to start...

I was sitting around last night, (monday I think) drunk and high, and watching C-SPAN, which happened to be airing the Senate hearings on the reorganization of the intelligence community. I took some notes on the names of the witnesses, but I don't have those now, so, to make it short, the three witnesses were a bunch of fogey hacks who had served as Secretary of Defense during past administrations (Nixon, Reagan, and Clinton respectively).

In short, most of the testimony was bullshit, and the senators present - McCaine, Lieberman, Clinton, Kennedy, etc, etc - only really showed up for the photo op, then promptly left, probably to smoke some rock and solicit prostitutes. [clearly, this is speculation, and is not meant to imply or state that any of the said individuals actually engaged in the illegal activities of "smoking rock" or "soliciting prostitutes."]

The "five-minutes-of-fame" absurdity reached its peak when Susan Collins (is that her name?) of Maine, who speaks in extremely halting tones, reminiscent of a person recovering from a terrible speech defect or mental impairment, took up her questioning. Not once, but twice, she referred to former Secretary of Defense Frank Carlucci, as Mr. Salucci!. Fuck! I mean - jesus people, come-the-fuck on - at least get the fucking name right! Even I can do that.

In conclusion: rest easy my friends. Our national security is safe in the hands of a pack of media-whore dunces. And that's just the senate. Don't get me started on the executive branch.

For the past week or so this whole "Swift Boat Captains [yada, yada...]" thing has been going on, and I have just been trying to block it out - with a great deal of success actually.

Well now I have been turned on to Who is Jerome Corsi, co-author of Swift Boat Vets attack book? @ Media Matters, and this shit is just too fucked up to ignore.

This little expose has a stack of gems, revealing that this Corsi guy is A) an idiot, B) wildly racist, C) obsessed with sodomy, and young boys, and D) obsessed with communism (didn't that go out of style a couple decades ago?) - in other words, typical Republican.

I'm not sure if anyone is in the market, but if you are looking for a Monkey Hunter, be sure to consider the services offered by my good friend Jürgen Johansen.

This website is selling a "Who Would Osama Vote For?" bumper sticker.

I want to get one, but $3 dollars is, like, half a rock, so I doubt I will.

This is, honestly, a riff that I stole from a conversation with Mr. A, but oh well - fuck it.

The gist is, that, in a head-to-head race, Obama could beat Jesus-fucking-Christ right now - that's how hot this fucker is.

And the only mother fucker crazy enough to challenge him is Allen-fucking-Keyes. No big fucking suprise there. So, now we all know who the next junior senator from Illinois will be.

Let's forget about Obama for a second. And focus on what's important - Me!

I'm drunk off my ass - having just polished a pint of vodka and a couple of beers - and I just finished off some microwave rewarmed pepperoni pizza that has me feeling like a god-damn gastric catastrophe. But I digress. The bottom line is that I am too sick and too drunk to write, and I need some fucking coke.

And now I sound like a broken record. Enough!

[In case you are wondering, I let the spellcheck "correct" the title on purpose.]

I know I have been coming down pretty hard on the NYT lately, but this article really set me off.

Of all the gimp ass bullshit I have read about drug addiction, this one is near the fucking worst. Total and complete fucking shite. Read and weep.

New Ways to Loosen Addiction's Grip

I would take the time to dissect the errors in this, but it isn't even worth the effort, the insipid stupidity of every sentence in this piece should be evident to anyone who reads it.

U.S. Defends Uribe Over Alleged Drug Ties

The United States rushed to the defense of Colombian President Alvaro Uribe Monday after a recently declassified 1991 U.S. military intelligence report linked him to powerful drug traffickers more than a decade ago

Apparently the DIA report stated that "Uribe has worked for the Medellin cartel and is a close personal friend of Pablo Escobar."

I wish I was a "close personal friend of PE," before he died that is.