War is Peace - Freedom is Slavery - Ignorance is Strength

Tuesday, June 08, 2004

You Are All Pigs

This story takes some setup, but here goes.

I was spending some time today with my nephew, who is five, and has a major obsession with the game "slug-bug." But it is not your regular slug-bug, this is a version of slug-bug that includes taxis, police cars, convertibles, jeeps, red pickups, limos, and god knows what else.

Anyway, the kid loves slug-bug, and he also loves to win, which means he cheats continuously. Most of the time the adults just ignore this, but every once in a while we will gang up and go all out, just to mess with him.

This is the situation that I found myself in earlier today, driving with my sister, grandma, and nephew. I had just gone into a long rant about "pigs," "swine," and "scum-suckers," for reasons that I don't even remember, and then I had gotten heavily into the slug-bug competition.

My sister, and myself were racking up literally dozens of scores, and my nephew was becoming increasingly aggravated. Finally he had had enough, and just yelled out at the top of his lungs:

"YOU ARE ALL PIGS!!!!"

It cracked me the fuck up. I am a great role-model.

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